Websites, tag lines, and titles, oh my!

PJ Sharon here today, and I’m asking for your help with some of my more immediately pressing concerns. First off, prioritizing my duties as an indie-published author and entrepreneur is challenging to say the least. There are many moving parts to this job and I wear more hats than guests at a royal wedding. While I await my second round of edits for WESTERN DESERT, I have time to work on my marketing strategy for the release next month. Priorities include scheduling a short blog tour, setting up an advertising budget for paid ads, a possible launch party of some sort, sending out press releases, and finishing my back cover copy and art. The list goes on, but sometimes, I just need to let my instincts take over and tell me what is most important for the day.

Of course, writing this blog is always on my Sunday to-do list—though it often falls over to Monday night at midnight—but today I was talking to my DH about a new website. Those of you who know me, know that I have talked about switching over to a WordPress site for my website and blog for at least the past year. Currently, I have a blog on Blogger and I have a website that I love, but it has some significant limitations. My Circle Pad site, which I pay the requisite $8.95 a month for hosting, has some quirks that make it not compatible with Apple products for one. Search engine optimization is lacking, and the interface, as user friendly as it is to work with, is antiquated and doesn’t stand up to today’s market equivalents. Even with all of that, I have resisted switching to WordPress because,

a.) I’m tech-phobic and,

b.) I can’t seem to make decisions about details such as colors, design, theme, or whether to go with .org or .com?

In a come-to-Jesus moment, I have decided to just suck it up and do it! No matter how overwhelmed I feel, the website change is a must-do. In forcing the issue, I have come to realize that part of what holds me back is that I still haven’t clearly identified my brand. I’ve gotten as far as to say, “I write romance fiction for teens and beyond,” but other than that I don’t really know what defines me as a writer these days.

This brings me to my second dilemma of the day:

Should I change my tag-line, and what should I change it to? My first three books, being contemporary YA romance with hopefully ever after endings fit fine with my “Extraordinary Stories of an Average Teenage Life” tag line. But now that I have added dystopian to my repertoire, “average” doesn’t seem suitable—not for genetically altered teens in a futuristic setting. There is still a romance, but the story clearly fits in the YA category of dystopian fiction rather than upper YA/NA stories. Romance readers are not necessarily sci-fi readers and vice versa, so I feel like maybe I need to change my image a bit to reach out to a broader audience. It occurs to me that maybe I’m having trouble pinpointing my target readership because I haven’t truly discovered my “hook”—that message in our style and voice that makes us unique and offers readers the promise of something different.

Once I understand what makes my stories extraordinary, and have narrowed down my tagline to who I am and what I write, then the web design should be easier. I also just finished taking an online web-design course to get me over my tech-fear, and DH has vowed to help me get set up on a WordPress site by the end of June when I launch Book Two in The Chronicles of Lily Carmichael, WESTERN DESERT.

This takes us to my third issue of the day, month, year…a title for the third book in the trilogy. Here are the parameters:

1) Title must be in adjective/noun format (Waning Moon, Western Desert)

2) It would be nice to keep with the “W” alliteration, but I’m not attached to that.

3) The title should reflect that Lily and Will are embarking on the final stage of their journey across a post-apocalyptic US. This time they are leaving Las Vegas and heading east along the southern route, which will take them through the Southern Swamps. (I already thought of that as a title but I think that would only work if there were a fourth book since this one will culminate in the final battle with the Industry and will take place in Chicago and then Vegas again. I do wish I had made it a series and not a trilogy…another lesson learned.)

4) Basically, I want a title that sounds catchy alongside the other two, is different enough to not be competing with a dozen other books by the same title, and one that metaphorically shows the shift to a hopeful ending rather than a title that focuses on gloom and doom.

These are a few of my ideas. I’d love to hear yours!

CHANGING/SHIFTING/RISING TIDES (you get the drift)
SHIFTING/RISING WINDS
STORM SURGE
HEALING WINDS

Thanks in advance for any help, advice, or suggestions!

The Saga of Mr. Fern

Mr. Fern, who by then was raggedy, although he still had green fronds, sat discarded outside the teachers’ room door at the school where my husband teaches, and rather than let him be consigned to the garbage, John brought him home. For years, Mr. Fern sat by the sliders to the deck in the winter, and on the deck, summers, and regenerated and bloomed, and — I truly believe — begat a whole family of ferns that return every year, shooting up like alien pods, in my pachysandra patch.

So it was with great sorrow that two or three years ago, we watched as Mr. Fern deteriorated to the point where he had no new growth, his leaves shriveled, browned, became dessicated, and he died.
We put him in the back yard nevertheless, loath to leave him in the detritus that would be cleared away in the bi-annual garden clean-up. And there he sat for a summer, a winter, another summer, forlorn, dried up, leafless, lifeless …

And then one summer day, I saw a sliver of green poking out from the midst of the jungle of brown. One fully formed fern frond, child-size, fresh green, fresh life, a little miracle stretching out from the dirt and decay. No stopping him then. I began watering him. He pushed out more long stringy fingers which turned into an explosion of brand new fronds.

Mr. Fern is back. Why, how, from that mass of crinkly dead leaves, I’ll never understand. I thought he was truly gone, and then, suddenly, there he was. And now he sits in my cluttered dining room by the sliding doors, growing and flourishing every day.

It’s a lesson to all of us. Sometimes we feel hopeless, helpless, dry, dessicated, chewed up, beaten down
– like we couldn’t produce another word, even if it was the word “I” — and we just bury ourselves and let it all go.

Don’t let go. We’re writers. There’s always life in there, even if at times it seems like still life with no possibilities. All it needs is a little poke and prod. A book, a word, an overheard conversation, something in the news — and we green up, poke our way out of the dessication, and get going.

Because we have to. Because there are stories to tell and we can tell them. Because there are fictional lives to explore, and we can do justice to them. Because when you’re a writer, you’re never not writing, even if you think you’re not.

And, because we can.

Thea Devine is currently working on her next erotic contemporary romance. She’s pleased to announce that five of her early books, Reckless Desire, Ecstasy’s Hostage, Relentless Passion, Montana Mistress and Angel Eyes are now available in Kindle editions.

Happy Pi Day!

Hi, peeps. Suze here, continuing last week’s discussion on letting your geek flag fly, and wishing you a very happy Pi day.

Pie? Did someone say pie? Sorry, this is not a bait and switch tactic. March 14, or 3-14, is a happy little holiday celebrating that mathematical wunderkind, Pi. Pi is defined as:

• A mathematical constant: a number approximately equal to 3.14159 that is the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter and is represented by the symbol π

Now don’t run away, screaming. I don’t find advanced math very interesting either, beyond (1) being able to balance the checkbook to see how much money I can spend on books; and (2) doubling cookie recipes.

But one thing I do find interesting is the notion of a constant. A thing whose value never changes. A thing you can always count on. Among my constants are my love for my family and friends and my love of the written and spoken word. Will those things change and grow over time? Sure. But the underlying value to me will always be there.

Pucker up, sweetie!

And now, because I feel bad about leading you on about the possibility of dessert, let’s chat over coffee and this virtual lemon meringue pie. What are your constants? What kind of pie do you like best?

Affirmations and Good Things to Come

It’s March, (click here to find out what I’m up to this month), and one step closer to spring…and not a moment too soon for me! It’s been a cold and cloudy winter, leaving many of us with a case of the doldrums, myself included. PJ here, and I’m going to share one of my best secrets for chasing away the blues. I’m sure you’ve all heard of the practice of saying AFFIRMATIONS. An affirmation, according to my Sage dictionary, is “a statement asserting the existence or the truth of something.” When you say an affirmation, you say it as if it has already come to pass and is the truth or reality of the situation. So instead of saying, “I’m going to lose weight,” you should say, “I am in my healthiest body ever.”

I can see you rolling your eyes…stop that! Speaking your reality into existence is the surest way to find success. Your brain doesn’t know the difference between a lie and the truth. It is only processing the information that you feed it, and verbal and audio cues are powerful bits of information. Most of us have lots of “old tapes” playing in our heads from as far back as childhood telling us that we aren’t good enough, pretty enough, smart enough…whatever. Of course, this is all garbage that our brains have stored and processed and that our subconscious mind believes to be true. If you look in the mirror and say, “I hate how fat I am, I’m so ugly, or how could anyone love someone like me,” you are convincing yourself that all of that crap is true. And guess what? Your brain will have you believing it to the point of making it your reality.

So let’s turn that around right now! The only way to erase those old tapes and negative thinking is to re-program how you think and speak about yourself. It takes consistency and practice, but you can completely change your mind and transform your life by doing this. If every day feels like a struggle to you and you have self-defeating thoughts, saying positive affirmations is the cure.

Here are a few of the affirmations I say often, some on a daily basis:

“You are beautiful, I love you, and I’m going to take really good care of you today.” (If you look at a picture of yourself as a child as you say this, over time you will experience a very powerful healing.)

“I attract wealth and good health.”

“I attract healthy and happy people into my life.”

“I have all the money I need.”

“I am a money magnet!” (Don’t forget to add the “thank you, thank you, thank you” to express your gratitude to the Universe for providing for you).

And my favorite, “I am an excellent writer, I am a bestselling author.”

Always use present tense and positive words to give your intention impact.

It feels silly when you first begin doing this, and the critical you will immediately want to negate what you’ve just said as being contrary to your previous programming, but if you stick with it, say it like you mean it, and believe that it is possible, your life will be transformed by this one simple practice. Even more powerful, is when you write your affirmations down, put up sticky notes everywhere, and say those affirmations out loud as often as possible. You are supercharging your affirmation by including visual, auditory, and tactile re-training. The act of writing it down alone can get your brain to start processing the new belief and making it your new reality. As an added incentive, try creating a vision board, incorporating images and words that portray the kind of life you want and the dreams you’d like to see come true. I’ve been doing it for years, and trust me…this works!

Today’s Unlocked Secret: If you want to succeed in any area of your life, create positive affirmations and practice saying them every day. Before you know it, your dreams will become a reality.

So what do you think? Can you formulate an affirmation that clearly states the reality of what you want? Care to share it?

The Change in Circumstances

Hiddey-ho Scribblers!  J Monkeys here.  I’m running a little late this morning – hopefully you haven’t all already visited today and I’ve missed you.  Why have I been writing my posts when I get up on Saturday morning instead of scheduling them in advance like I’ve done for the past nearly two years?  There’s been a change in my circumstances and I haven’t fully adjusted yet.  In addition to being a full-time mom and a part-time writer, I’m now someone’s part-time employee, too!  It’s awesome and I’m wicked excited about it – but I haven’t figured out how to balance my responsibilities with the hours in a day yet.  It’s a constant struggle for me.

So I’ve had one change in my circumstances and I’m anticipating another.  Earlier this week, I had one of my nearly 5-year old sons tested for Celiac.  I’m still waiting for the results, but it could mean a major change in circumstances, not just for me, but for all the “characters” living in my house. 

Celiac, for those unfamiliar with the…desease, disorder, issue?…means that you can’t eat gluten – no wheat at all.  In his case, it will go hand-in-hand with a milk allergy.  Here’s a link to more information if you are interested.  Now, not only is there a TON of information about celiac available out there, and there’s an aisle full of gluten-free products in my grocery store, but my son’s godfather has the same issue but very severely and can be a wonderful resource for me having lived with it for 40+ years.  So either way, we’ll be good.

But this got me thinking about how we writers need to change the circumstances on our characters.  Pull the rug out from under them, turn life on their head, leave them topsy-turvy.  I enjoy change – I always have.  I love to play “What if” games in my head.  What if we get snowed in and I’m stuck at the mall, all alone?  What if everyone in my neighborhood drops dead from a superflu and society as we know it collapses overnight?  (Don’t worry, my family is usually uninfected with the flu in this head-game.)  What if I won the $365 million lottery?  What if I decided to plant a garden this year? 

As writers, we have to change our characters lives and then help them work through the results of that change.  But lots of people hate change or fear it.  Often that’s the same thing.  Maybe that’s why people like to read – to see how the other half live.  To experience a (usually dramatic) change in circumstances in the safety of our own home.  I know that’s why I like it.  Did I just say I liked to read?  Ha-hmmmm.  I mean that’s why I love to read. 

Today’s not-so-secret Secret: Changes in circumstances can come from anywhere and involve anything.  If you run out of ideas, or realize that you haven’t changed your characters circumstances enough, look to your own life for inspiration.

Today’s Question: What’s your favorite type of change-in-circumstance story?  I love historical romances and more modern day, they’ve-kept-these-secrets-from-us-for-millenia-but-now-it’s-all-coming-to-light-and-boy-are-we-in-trouble type stories.

Today’s bonus secret: click to here to see what changes are in store for our beloved Eric Northman – they’ve begun filming True Blood season 6!  Yippeeee.

What is your “WHY”?

PJ here, sharing some motivational thoughts that might inspire you to embrace the challenges in your life today—whether they be writing challenges or fitness challenges. I’ve had several big milestones this week that have motivated me to forge on in spite of the occasional bouts of “to-do-list-itis” that require me to wear more hats than Jackie-O. Let’s face it; the writing life is not for sissies. So when I have a good week, it’s worth celebrating and taking a moment to reflect on what made it so great.

In the past week, I finished the first draft of my current WIP, WESTERN DESERT. That alone is enough to make any writer smile and breathe a sigh of relief. I also celebrated a birthday—not the BIG one, but getting close. Chomping at the heels of a half century of life experience is definitely a wake-up call. It was time to take stock and ask the hard questions. Have I been doing all that I can to ensure a balanced and healthy quality of life? Um…not really. I’ve been sitting too much, eating the wrong foods, not getting enough sleep, and generally overworking for the past couple of years. Sound familiar? Like most people, I have plenty of reasons WHY my life is so hectic. After all, I run two businesses full time and have a house to maintain. But when I look at what’s holding me back from my highest good, I realize that all of the reasons “WHY,” no matter how valid, added up to a bunch of excuses. Since attempting to turn over a new leaf, the past few months have been much better, but still not enough change to suit me or meet my weight-loss and life balance goals. I needed to go beyond “trying” and find that thing that would motivate me to succeed. I needed a better “WHY”.

For me, the only “WHY” I need to focus on is “WHY do I want to be my best, healthiest, most balanced self?” The answer is simple, really. I want the second half of my life to be full, happy, and healthy. I want to have the energy to do all that I need or want to do. I want to be here for my family and friends for a very long time, and I want quality living for as many days as I have in the rest of this lifetime. Is there any better motivation for making your health a priority?

In response to my “uh-oh” moment several weeks ago when I stepped on a scale for the first time in a few months and saw a number I’d only seen once before (when I was pregnant with my first son), I started a new exercise regimen. I found the Jillian Michaels’ Body Revolution ninety-day program on an info-mercial and was immediately drawn to the concept of a thirty minute a day commitment. I figured I could do anything for thirty minutes a day. It seemed like just what I needed to beef up my exercise routine and challenge myself to get fit—a challenge I readily accepted, being that I was getting nowhere doing it on my own. Even though I’m a personal trainer, I too have difficulty working myself out to my fullest potential. We all need a push now and then. As Jillian says, “We all need to have a WHY that makes any amount of hard work worth it.” A couple of weeks into the program and I’m six pounds lighter and feeling better already.

I encourage you to take a look at your life and ask yourself what’s holding you back from your highest good.

UNLOCKED SECRET: Discover your “WHY” and make a new commitment to doing everything within your power to take control of your health. NO EXCUSES!
What is the “WHY” in your life? That reason/goal/motivation that would make any amount of work worth the effort it took to be your best you.

Writer’s cramp and other maladies…

Is your writing career turning into a pain in the neck? Do you experience occasional numbness and tingling in your hands? Does it feel like it’s impossible to sit up straight for any length of time at the computer? Headaches? Muscle spasms? Wrist and forearm pain? Cramps? Tendinitis? These are all symptoms of the postural imbalances that are created when we spend too much time sitting at the computer. If it feels as if gravity is winning and you are slowly shrinking into a ball of knots, consider that this post is for you.

PJ Sharon here, and after twenty years as a Physical Therapist Assistant in the field of Orthopedics and Sports Medicine, and eight years as a Massage Therapist and personal trainer, I have a unique perspective on how to address these issues. I’ve come to see our current sedentary lifestyle as the “De-Evolution of man.”

Is this where I’m headed?

Humor me when I suggest that for the past 50,000 years or so, we have walked upright for good reason. We could not have created the world we know today if this evolutionary change had not occurred. So why, in the past hundred years have we become a society of people who can’t run fast enough to save our lives, let alone catch our dinner? How have we devolved so quickly that heart disease, Diabetes, and Cancer are killing us at epidemic rates while most of us have access to the most advanced medical technologies known to mankind? So glad you asked!

I’ll leave the huge problems with our diet, pollutants, chemical toxicity, and over-dependence on sugar for another day. Today, I’ll focus on one simple fact that is at the root of many of our health issues–especially our orthopedic complaints. One fact that we can control. Our bodies are not designed for prolonged sitting—although our widening hips and increased padding may suggest otherwise. I’m sure none of us wants that to be our evolutionary norm. We may not be able to fight “progress” in the world of technology or the societal decline of a physically active lifestyle, but we can change how much WE sit. The rise in health problems coming about because of the “computer-age lifestyle” should be evidence enough that things need to change. READ this NY Times article if you think I’m exaggerating.

But change isn’t so easy, is it?

I’m a big one for focusing on what we CAN do rather than what we CAN’T. So here are a few things that may help.

1) Check your set-up (feet flat on floor, support behind your lower back, knees lower than your hips, screen directly in front of you, and mouse in close enough to keep your elbow in close to your body. Avoid reaching and make sure you have a wrist support.

2) Stop every hour and get up, walk around, stretch and drink water.

3) Try a “stand-up desk” or a “treadmill desk.” Check out the above article for suggestions.

4) More on stretching—

a) Hold stretches and breathe deeply four or five times. Stretching should not be painful. If it hurts, stop and get proper instruction from a physical therapist or personal trainer.

b) Tip ear toward shoulder and extend opposite arm out to side to stretch the deep neck stabilizers. When these muscles are chronically tight, it weakens the neck and can also contribute to nerve impingement and carpal tunnel symptoms.

c) Stretch your forearms by extending your arm straight out in front and gently pulling your fingers down toward the floor and then up toward the sky. There are a few variations of this to stretch deeper into the forearm muscles.
Yoga postures are great for wrist flexibility and strength.

d) Stretch your legs. Basic calf, quad, hamstring, hip flexor, and piriformis stretches can make a remarkable impact on spinal tensions that affect the neck and back. It is worth working with a certified trainer to learn proper stretching technique.

e) Get a massage on a regular basis. Once a month is recommended for maintenance. At the very least, every three months is acceptable. You probably change the oil in your car and pay your taxes that often. How much more important is it to take care of yourself?

Today’s unlocked secret: The bottom line is that we need to get off our bottoms!

A final thought—if you really are the boss, would you treat an employee the way you treat yourself, or would you insist they take care of themselves properly and encourage them to avoid overuse issues that would ultimately cost you in decreased productivity?

Okay, writers…what are you willing to change to correct this De-Evolutionary disaster waiting to happen?

Whether or not the Weather Plays a role in Your Stories by Katy Lee

Let’s face it, in real life it rains, and our lives go on with no underline motive because of it. But what about the lives of our characters in our stories? Can we just have a rainy day that means it’s raining and nothing else? Perhaps, but I think there’s something raw about rain that brings out the worst in us, which usually isn’t too far from the truth. So the rain can actually be a good tool to use to make your character, and reader, see the truth.

I think of my novel Real Virtue and how the rainy scene takes place in the book where everything becomes clear for my heroine and I don’t mean sparkly, but rather Mel’s eyes are opened to the truth. Truth about her mother. Truth about the hero. And the truth about herself. And even though the rain is coming down in buckets outside, her mind’s eye is now seeing nothing but sunny skies ahead.

Now it’s not only books I see this in but also the movies. Take the movie The Notebook where Noah and Allie get stuck in the rain and it cues their frustration and pain with their lost years. At first the scene is cute and funny, but it’s not long before it gets down and gritty, and once again the truth is coming out. And who doesn’t like a good kiss in the rain? (Go ahead take a look…it’s pretty swoon worthy.)

Another of my favorite movies is The Thomas Crown Affair. Now with this one, it’s not the rain that exposes the truth, but rather the fire sprinklers spraying down on the art work. As Nina Simone sings her appropriate song, Sinnerman, it’s the water that makes everything clear, once again, exposing the truth. (You can watch, but warning—spoiler alert! It gives away ending and there is some swearing in background.)

There’s just something about water and its cleansing capabilities that makes great fodder for literature and entertainment. If only a good rainstorm had the potential to clean up our lives and our world so well, but alas, that only happens in the movies. Ooh, perhaps my rainy scene will make my book movie material. Hey, a girl can dream, right? But seriously, my stories are inspirationals, and a big part of Christian fiction is the moment of truth. The washing away of sins or uncovering of lies, so the chains that bind can be broken and our characters can heal and move on. However, in truth, a good rainstorm is not going to take care of those things. That cleansing comes only from Christ, but the rain sure does make for a dramatic punch in our fiction worlds.

The Unlocked Secret: So I say go ahead and give motive to your downpours. Strategically place them to add turmoil and angst for your characters. If nothing else, it’s fun to torture them. But more importantly, I think a good downpour is a symbolic way to say from here on in, things are changing. Out with the old, in with the new.

The Change Exchange

Long ago, in a publishing landscape far away — does it seem like I’m beginning too many posts this way? I bet you can tell it’s Thea Devine posting today. In any event, Casey’s post a few days ago about flying monkeys called to mind a conference I ran many years ago where I’d invited not only industry people, but also the gentleman in charge of programming at Lifetime TV (seemed like a natural fit, romance and Lifetime), and a producer from USANetwork. I don’t remember anything from any of the workshops I attended (it was a looong time ago) except this: the USA producer talked about writing TV drama and the key to moving the story along.

He said, at the end of each act, something must change.

Extrapolate that for novelists: At the end of each chapter, something must change.

Think about it. Every little shift and setback, a small emotional moment, a big get out of my face statement — and something changes. It can be subtle or monumental. It can be something someone says, or something your heroine sees, or realizes, or theorizes (rightly or wrongly). It could be someone setting your protagonist on the wrong track. It could be a disappointment, a revelation, a decision, an apology, a resolution, an action, or taking no action. It could be something that’s not what it seems or someone’s hidden agenda.

Any of those changes (or any you could think of) should send your protagonist off in a different direction which will lead to more changes, more ramifications and more consequences.
In essence, you’re programming: if heroine does this, then this could happen. Or that. If she says something, someone could be affected negatively, or someone could overhear and spread gossip about it. If she chooses to leave, she will feel free, or she will feel as if she were falling into a black hole all alone. If the hero confesses everything he knows, he would be breaking a childhood code of silence, and therefore implicating his friends in a long ago unsolved misadventure … but he’ll win back the woman he loves.

Each of these moments of change has consequences which then raise the stakes in each succeeding chapter, almost like you’re climbing steps from one complication/change to the next until everything is tied up at the end.

So ask yourself at the end of each chapter: what changes? What can change? If something changed, what would shift? What would send the heroine in a different direction? What if it did? What if it didn’t? What if she wants to stay in place when even when she has choices? What if someone gives her an ultimatum? Or challenges her? What if she walks away from everything? And then wishes she hadn’t. Or is ecstatic that she did?

What happens next?

I leave that to your imagination, your tolerance for change, your aversion to or embrace of risk — in fiction and in life.

Thea Devine’s books defined erotic historical romance. She is the USAToday best-selling author of 25 erotic historical and contemporary romances and a dozen novellas.. Her 2008 erotic contemporary romance, His Little Black Book, was reissued in October. She’s currently working on a new novel.

PJ’s Top 10 Health Tips for 2013

Welcome! Tuesday’s Scribe here. This is an extra long post, but worth the read if you’ll bear with me. Being a Massage Therapist and personal trainer in the “real world” doesn’t exempt me from the laws of nature. That means that I am as susceptible as you are to the effects of gravity. As the image in my mirror reveals (it refuses to lie no matter how many spells I cast upon it), I can’t hide the addition of several pounds of holiday related “rolls”(ew). Yes, I too suffer from the intense attachment to chocolate that plagues even the strictest of gym rats. I’m PJ Sharon, and I, like many of you, am determined to do serious battle with my new found “writer’s bulge,” courtesy of my first year in publishing.

I know, I know…another diet, another fitness plan. Every January  the gyms are flooded with well-meaning but “weak-willed” souls who last about a month and then fall back into their old rut of unhealthy living. The truth is, living healthy is not rocket science. A healthy lifestyle is not a “diet” or an “exercise routine.” It requires a long term commitment to change. I wish I had the secret to turning on the “self-control” and “self-discipline” switches in the brain that some have and others struggle to find. There are many factors that influence us to take care of ourselves, but none is greater than healthy self-esteem. If you’ve tried and failed on your own and repeatedly lost and gained a significant amount of weight, I highly recommend you seek counseling to address the underlying issues that are keeping you stuck.

It may sound mean, but we all know when we put something in our mouth if it’s good for us or not. If you don’t know this, join Weight-Watchers and learn how to make healthier choices. Usually, we know when we are over-eating, and we definitely know when we aren’t getting enough rest (one of the leading contributors to weight gain). The trick is in catching the problems early. It’s infinitely easier to get back on track when we’ve gained only a few pounds instead of waiting until it’s ten or twenty…or fifty. It’s not hard to imagine why our clothes are fitting tighter than we like, or why we feel like crap from the sugar hangover we inflicted the night before by eating pizza, drinking that “extra” glass of wine, and then scarfing down chocolate ice cream for dessert. I’m not saying you can’t eat a piece of pizza or enjoy a glass of wine occasionally, but learn about portion sizes and find alternatives to these “fun” foods, saving the real deal for special occasions. And no…Friday night is not a special occasion. There are tons of creative ways to prepare foods that are healthy and delicious. Explore…get out of your rut!

I don’t know about you, but this being a grown up thing is a mixed blessing. Being an adult means that I can do what I want…eat what I want, right? Sure…if I want to live with the consequences. On the down side, there’s no one else to blame for my declining health or weight gain but me.  The bottom line is that I’m responsible for making good choices…about food, about my activity level, about cultivating healthy relationships, and about my work habits.

The first change I’ve made in the past few months is creating time to take care of myself by designing a work schedule that I can live with. That means regular office hours set aside to run my author business, and regularly scheduled work out sessions. Whatever I don’t get done in my office on any given day/night, I choose to let go and trust that I’ve done enough for that day. I will no longer sacrifice my “Healthy Me” time for social media or other tasks that will still be there the next day calling out to me. I know we’re all struggling to find balance these days, but honestly, none of it is worth dying over.

I’ve often told my clients that a healthy lifestyle is your best tool for success. I still believe that. I’d like to share some tips that I’ll be using to get back on track. I hope you’ll join me.

1)      HYDRATE- I’m not talking about ten cups of coffee or a liter of Diet Coke. I mean good old fashioned water. A good rule is to take your weight, divide by three, and that’s how many ounces per day of water you need to drink to stay properly hydrated. (Ie: A 150 pound person should consume 50 ounces of water per day). ** Fill a large water bottle first thing in the morning and drink it throughout the day, refilling as necessary to meet your daily ounce count. Feel free to add a slice of lemon. You’ll find you have more energy, you’re less hungry, and you’ll suffer fewer headaches, leg cramps, and muscle aches if you are hydrated. Trust me; your body will thank you!

2)      BANISH THE BREAD!-No not that!!!-White breads in particular break down into simple sugars very quickly. If you are sedentary, all that sugar gets stored as fat for later. But in this line of work, later never seems to come. Avoid white, starchy foods altogether. Switch from white potatoes to sweet potatoes, white rice to brown rice, and stock up on quinoa, cous cous, beans/legumes, and taboule, adding these complex whole grains and protein/fiber rich foods to salads or serving them as side dishes. Now most of us have already switched to “whole grain” breads, but if you read the label on your bread, you’ll likely find high fructose corn syrup, sugar, and a host of other additives and preservatives. **Try Ezekiel 4:9 Bread. You can find it in the refrigerator section of your grocer or local health food store. It has no flour! Instead it’s made from sprouted live grains like wheat, barley, millet, lentils, soybeans and spelt. It packs a whopping 4grams of protein, 3 grams of fiber and is sugar free and fat free, and only 80 calories per slice. It tastes great, too!

3)      WALKING MEDITATION-Meditating is one of the healthiest and most difficult practices to cultivate. Most of us can’t sit still and empty our minds for ten seconds, let alone twenty minutes. But just twenty minutes a day of meditation can be life changing. It reduces your stress level, improves your immune system, and has so many health benefits I couldn’t possibly list them all here. Ironically, twenty minutes of walking daily does much the same thing. Imagine if you combine them! I’m all for multi-tasking, even when it comes to taking time to BE PRESENT! **Take a twenty minute walk daily. It doesn’t matter what time of day or even if you break it up into two ten minute walks, but do it—every day. While you’re walking think about your breathing. Feel each heel strike. Notice your arms swinging at your sides. Be aware of your posture, tuning in your abdomen and keeping your shoulders back. This conscious awareness of your body is as much a meditation as sitting cross-legged on a mat.

4)      STRETCH-I suggest frequent stretch breaks throughout the day. If you join a yoga class and go 2-3 times a week, maybe this isn’t as important, but if you are sitting at your computer for several hours a day, it’s beneficial and takes no time at all to stop for a few minutes every hour and stretch. If you don’t know what stretches to do or have some physical limitations that prevent you from exercising, seek advice from a physical therapist or qualified trainer.

5)      START WITH PROTEIN and FIBER-Starting your day with carbohydrates sets you up for blood sugar spikes and dips that will have you craving a candy bar before noon. Skip the bagel or the cold cereal and opt instead for an egg white omelet with veggies or a bowl of oatmeal or multigrain hot cereal with nuts, cinnamon, and fruit. (Cinnamon is a natural anti-inflammatory). Loading your breakfast with high protein, high fiber and nutrient packed foods will keep your blood sugar levels balanced and help curb cravings. A handful of nuts or a high protein yogurt (Greek yogurt is yummy and packs about 15 grams of protein) for your mid-morning or late afternoon snack will keep you from binging at meal times.

6)      VITAMINS-Due to soil depletion, over processing of foods, and our generally poor diets, most of us are vitamin deficient and don’t know it. Fatigue, weight gain, inability to concentrate, skin conditions, joint pains, neurological symptoms…you name it, vitamin deficiencies could be the cause. A daily multi-vitamin is a must and some people could benefit from other supplements depending on your individual needs. You may have to see a nutritionist or Naturopath to address this issue. Ask your doctor if he/she can perform a blood panel to screen for vitamin and mineral deficiencies. Many women in particular are lacking in Vitamin D, which can lead to a whole host of ailments including porous bones and hair loss…eeek! It’s worth a blood test.

7)      STRENGTHEN YOUR MIND AND BODY-Lifting light weights, swimming, yoga, cycling, or even dancing around your house with the vacuum cleaner are all ways to burn calories and strengthen your core (the muscles of your trunk that offer a stable center for your extremities to work from.) In addition to strengthening muscles and improving your posture and balance, regular exercise strengthens your heart, releases endorphins that ease pain, and improves your mental attitude/mood. When you feel strong, you are more confident. If you need another convincing tid-bit, lean muscle mass burns calories more efficiently and your clothes fit better.

8)      AFFIRMATIONS-I’m a consummate goal setter. Not that I achieve all of my goals, mind you, but I make them, check in on them now and then, and adjust the plan accordingly. What I do know about goal setting is that I have to be able to imagine the desired outcome before I can make it a reality. I have to believe I can achieve it, and then I have to speak it into existence by making choices that lead me in the direction of achieving my goal. Affirmations are those positive messages that I speak to make my goals come to fruition. **Start every writing session with an affirmation. Ie: “I am an excellent writer. I am a bestselling author,” etc. Start every workout with an affirmation. Ie: “I am lean, healthy, and strong. I look awesome in size eight jeans”…you get the picture. See it, believe it is possible, and speak it into existence as if it is already the reality. Over time, your brain has no choice but to comply by making it so, and eventually your body will catch on.

9)      RELATIONSHIPS-“No man (or woman) is an Island.” Or so the saying goes. I don’t know about you, but I would be nowhere without the help and friendship of other writers, friends, family, and especially my dear husband. It’s easy to become isolated when so many of our hours are spent behind a computer screen. Connecting with and showing appreciation for the people in my life is something I don’t ever want to put off until tomorrow. There comes a time in every life when tomorrow won’t come for us or a loved one. **Don’t let a day go by without showing the people in your life how much they mean to you.

10)  GRATITUDE THROUGH KINDNESS-I’m a big believer in random acts of kindness. Nothing gets you out of your own head and gives you a lift as much as showing your gratitude for all that you have in your life by paying it forward. It’s much easier to see the good in your life when you recognize a need and fill it in someone else’s life. Volunteer, reach out to help someone in need, donate your time or money to a worthy cause. Get involved. We are all intricately connected in this world and there is no reason why any of us should feel alone.

Any other tips you want to share?

Blessings in the New Year,

PJ