Hello Scribblers, J here. Happy Saturday to you all. I’m going to ask Casey or Susannah to reply to your comments on my behalf because….dum da da daaaaaaa…I’m away today. Yes, this is the weekend when I abandon all of my other hats, and just be me.
Are you unfamiliar with my hats? Check out this post from November when they all fell off. Basically, I’m a mom/wife first, author second and everything else falls to a distant third place. The woman that I was before I acquired all those other hats is in there somewhere, but often buried under the hat tree.
I was lucky enough to have a few years (back in my mid-twenties) to do whatever I wanted. I had no responsibilities other than to pay my bills, small as they were. I would lounge around all day (on weekends) and read, or go to a movie or do crafty things. That’s me, that’s what I like to do. Of course I love all of my other responsibilities too, but sometimes those hats get heavy. Do you ever wish you could shake them off, just for a few minutes?
Six years ago, I started going to an annual scrapbooking weekend retreat in January. I love it. I leave early Friday morning and come home late Sunday night. No kids, no dishes, no cooking, no diapers, no housework. Just 3 days of crafting. I look forward to this event all year. I’ve made some friends that I see just at this event. I love it.
I’ve been a stay-at-home mom for two and a half years now. I knew that I wouldn’t be sitting around eating bon bons all day, but I didn’t know that this would be the toughest job I ever had. And in addition to the lack of pay check, there’s no annual review or bonus to tell me how well I’m doing. Just the same routine every day, 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year. I think that might be the definition of drudgery.
But the thing I’ve learned over the last couple of years is that it is VERY important to take some time for myself, separate from writing time. Writing is my part-time job that hopefully is going to pay financial rewards some day. It’s a good thing for me to take time to make myself happy, to refill myself with patience and creativity. It’s good for me, it’s good for my kids and it’s good for my husband.
I’m not abandoning my boys when I take one weekend off a year, and a day a month, too. I’m teaching them that Mom is a person who has hopes and dreams and works to find the time to make those dreams come true. That it’s important to do so. And I’m giving them a tremendous gift: time just with Daddy. Daddy works hard all week and only gets to spend an hour with them each day before it’s their bedtime. More on the weekends, of course, but still. Other moms at the retreat call home every few hours to see what the kids are doing with dad. Are they eating healthy? Staying away from the TV? That’s not for me. I call at bedtime to say goodnight and that’s it. It’s not Daddy’s first rodeo. If he wants to feed them McDonald’s 3 times a day (he doesn’t) for 3 days once a year, it won’t hurt ’em. If he wants to get them all sugared up right before bed, well, it’s his funeral – what do I care? I’m not there to worry about it.
Today’s secret: It’s important for you to take time for yourself, doing something you want to do. It’s good for you and those who depend on you.
Today’s question: How do you pamper yourself?