Moms and Hot Sex Scenes

Last weekend my entire family came from New York to celebrate my twenty-eighth birthday. We went to a small family owned Mexican restaurant that makes kick ass guacamole and really good raspberry margaritas. That fact that we were ALL together was a novelty. With work and school and living in separate states it’s rare we all get to eat at the same table.

So there I was seated between my parents and across from brothers. Everybody was having their own conversation when my mom mentioned to me that she was still reading Dangerous Curves Ahead and that one scene brought up a memory from her past.  I knew the scene she was talking about. I knew it very well because it took place shortly after my hero and heroine get it on for the first time. So, I turn to look at her and quietly say, “I guess you survived the sex scene.”

At that point all conversation at the table had stopped.  My father looked off into space as if he had suddenly went deaf. Three brothers stared at me. The word SEX seemed to have a magical effect on them, because normally they never pay any attention to what I say.

“Yes, I survived the sex scene,” my mother continued, not seeming to notice that the table suddenly went quiet. She put her hand on her forehead and stared at me. “I can’t believe you know so much. I can’t believe you’re so descriptive. A mother doesn’t want to think about her daughter knowing so much about sex. It makes me uncomfortable.”

I have read HUNDREDS of romance novels in my day. While my stuff isn’t exactly sweet, it certainly isn’t anywhere near erotica. “You just don’t read romance novels trust me, Ma. That was nothing.”

Meanwhile in my head I’m thinking, wait until she gets to second sex scene. Wait till she reads my books that are coming out for Harlequin.  But I say nothing. I catch my youngest brother staring at me from across the table. He’s always surprised when I know anything about sex. In his eyes I’m supposed to be this lame virginal super good girl, who has never heard  the word  PENIS much less have seen one. And I understand why he thinks that way. I’m the prude in my family.

photo (11)
My mother and I on my 28th birthday.

But I’m twenty-eight. Hello!

“It’s like Fifty Shades of Grey without the torture,” my mother goes on, clearly distressed about my life’s choice to write romance novels.

“It is not!” I’m offended by this. There is no bondage in my book. There is no sex for sex sake. I’m rather fond of those scenes. They’re some of the best I’ve written. “Besides, you’ve never read Fifty Shades. How would you know?”

“I just know,” she says.

My brother Jordan who always has something to say, says nothing. Jason continues to eat tortilla chips. Jonathan keeps looking at me as if he is trying to figure out if I’m secretly turning tricks on my free time. My father continues to stare at the sun sculpture on the wall behind him. I feel sorry for the man. He didn’t deserve this.

I’m sure my family all thinks I’m a pornographer now, but that’s okay. I’m going to keep on reading and writing those sexy sex books. And maybe someday my family will get who I am.

What about you? How would you feel if your kid starting writing romance novels?


13 thoughts on “Moms and Hot Sex Scenes”

  1. I would be so proud…although I can’t imagine either of my sons writing romance novels. I’m sure your family is super proud of you. They just might not have said it yet:-)

  2. I would love it. In fact, one of my married sons talks opening to me about his attitude about sex. It is an interesting question though Sugar . . . I agree with Paula. I’m sure your family is more than proud of you and where you are going with your career. They just a little uncomfortable, but they’ll adjust. This birthday celebration was the best, it opened doors. They all came to celebrate with you, right? You are special.

  3. Thanks for sharing I had a good laugh. Seeing myself in your shoes. Our parents is some times clueless of the knowledge we have and putting it in a book is just unimaginable.
    I would love if my children could write about sex. Meaning they are aware of their bodies and know how to be loved.

  4. Don’t you worry, Sugar. Their attitude will change when you are raking in the cash! I have to admit that I felt a little weird when male friends of mine read my books. But, my Aunt (in her 70s) has read my books and loved them. My son (only child) has always been very open with me and we can talk about anything. I don’t think it would bother me if he wrote a love scene.

  5. I like to think I’d be okay if my son (who’s only 11 now, granted) were to write romance someday. As uncomfortable as I am with the idea of him having sex, I do want grandchildren!

  6. Hey, Sugar, what else is new? I went through a torture similar to yours and quickly discovered my audience sucked it up without any problems. The minister of my church, one of the first to read my novels, even remarked how much he loved them–“especially the sex scenes.

      1. I AM a minister and I write sex scenes! Personally, I think romance novels are a great way for women to become more open about their sexuality. I’m grateful for my mom’s support from day one. It’s strengthened our relationship and I sure hope I would support my kids in the same way!

  7. This was such a great piece. I felt as though I was there (no coincidence, as that’s certainly the secret of a good sex scene). I went through this, although with daughters rather than parents and siblings. Hello, I have six children. Evidently I am on a first name basis with the stork. Actually, I sort of enjoy my nickname Inappropriate Mom. Better that, maybe (or so I tell myself) than Uncommunicative Mom.

  8. My daughter’s boutique carries my memoir. It was meant to have a single steamy chapter, to bring a romance to closure, but three chapters were required to do so, plus a sprinkling of mentions. My granddaughter, acting as sales girl for the day, sold a copy to an older woman. The customer asked her if she’d read it, to which Viktoria replied: “I’m not supposed to read it until I’m sixty-five.” She is now 19. She continued, breathlessly: “My grammie had a very active sex life.” The woman bought the book.

    How would I feel if any of my children and grandchildren wrote about sex? Fine, as long as it included respect and self-respect. And, it was well written. 🙂

    Great posting, Jamie!

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